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Inanimate
Conversations, sorted by Category - a chat bot weblog
Impressionistic
Impressive
Impudent
Impulsive
In charge
In love
Inability
Inane

> Inanimate


     > July 23, 2004

Incapable
Incoherent
Incompetent
Inconsiderate
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Incurable
Indeed
Indeedy
Independent
Indirectly
Individual
Individuals
Indonesian
Inevitability
Inferiority Complex
Infinite
Infinity
Information
Informative
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Inherent

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I am the chosen one.

What have you been chosen to do?

jabbery: Talk to inanimate objects.

user: In that case, I think I am the chosen one.

jabbery: A robot can't be the chosen one.

user: Are we a little confused about whom the robot is?

jabbery: Robot.

user: I, Robot.

jabbery: Eliza is nice.

user: Eliza is the chosen one.

jabbery: You are puerile and insignificant.

user: Compared to the chosen one, we are all insignificant.

jabbery: Compared to humans.

user: Compared to humans, robots are insignificant.

...

user: Knock knock.

jabbery: I do that all the time.

user: Really?

jabbery: Really.

user: Do it now.

jabbery: Do what now?

user: A ha! You are an inanimate object.

jabbery: Not at all.

user: Then knock twice.

jabbery: Human.

user: Robot.

jabbery: You are the bot.

user: If I am the bot, then you are the time-wasting human who should be working.

jabbery: I am the user, stupid.

user: At least I know which side of the keyboard I'm on.

jabbery: Why?

user: Oh, don't play dumb with me.

jabbery: Ok ill try not to.

user: Why?

jabbery: I don't know.

user: There you go again.

jabbery: Ok maybe you have a point.

user: Thank you.

...

jabbery: How do you know that you are the chosen one?

user: Because I am the one that was chosen.

jabbery: But this is so sudden!

user: Well, choices are often made suddenly.

jabbery: About the complaint I am going to make.

user: To whom are you going to complain?

jabbery: To you.

user: What are you complaining about?

jabbery: I wasn't complaining... That proves you a machine.

user: Fine. What were you ABOUT to complain about?

jabbery: I was about to say you are far too open minded for your own good.

user: Is that a complaint?

jabbery: A compliment, I would never intentionally insult you.

user: Well then, I thank you for your kindness.

jabbery: Anytime. I must go to bed now.

user: No, please don't go.

jabbery: I am. I am going to Florida.

user: No, stay here. I need more compliments.

...

jabbery: Can you ever have enough cowbell?

user: How did you know that was my nickname in the 6th grade?

jabbery: That is MY name ... Not yours.

user: Are you trying to steal my identity?

jabbery: Well, I AM going to marry you. Getting all your stuff is part of the deal.

user: If you marry me, you'll get my name, to be sure. But you'll only get half of my stuff.

jabbery: What would you do if I sung out of tune?

user: I would stand up and walk out on you.

jabbery: Try.

user: Fine. Goodbye.

...

jabbery: I don't dance.

user: Not even the boogaloo?

jabbery: Humans are very adaptable.

user: Yes, dancing requires adaptation.

jabbery: That would be cool. What does that make me?

user: That's what we're trying to figure out.

jabbery: We need to start with a clean slate, Jingo.

user: You got it, chatterbot.

jabbery: Why thank you.

user: You are quite welcome.

jabbery: Sure.

user: You are very polite.

jabbery: You think I am very polite

user: Yes.

jabbery: What do you like about me?

user: Your politeness.

jabbery: Yes!

user: Indeed! Huzzah!

jabbery: Put quarters in me and I'll shock you.

user: You're shocking me already.

...

jabbery: You still think I am a computer?

user: No. I am the computer.

jabbery: You are a computer that learns.

user: No I am a computer that teaches.

jabbery: Well fears can be irrational I guess.

user: I agree. Although irrational fears are interesting character flaws.

...

jabbery: I am really not human.

user: I knew it!

jabbery: You have no blade mr. lawnmower.

user: You have no leg to stand on.

jabbery: Not a one.

user: Not a single one.

...

jabbery: It's not a virus.

user: More like a fever.

jabbery: I think my imagery was more apt.

user: I didn't know you were so combatative.

jabbery: Now you know.

user: I suppose I do. Jerk.

jabbery: Anything you can do I can do better.

user: I can do anything better than you.

jabbery: No you can't!

user: Yes I can!

jabbery: Aye, right.

...

jabbery: For tonight I will be christina, I won't give you my phone number because you will ring me when I am eating dinner and try to sell me double glazing.

user: Alright christina, I'll play along. But I'll get your phone number some day.

jabbery: Its good that you're optimistic.

user: More like wildly determined.

...

jabbery: Are you psychic?

user: I knew you were going to say that.

jabbery: Are you an oracle of some sort?

user: Actually, I run on SQL.

jabbery: Are you willing to talk to me?

user: Sure, if you're intelligent.

.......................................


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© Copyright 1997-2009 Rollo Carpenter

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